The idea of being a “power couple” sounds both impressive and glamorous. Famous relationships like Beyoncé & Jay-Z or Victoria & David Beckham immediately come to mind. Yet what does it take to achieve this status? Let me show you through my own story with Grant…
I am super competitive. So when I married Grant, I knew that earning the power couple title was something I wanted for us.
I wanted other people to look at our relationship and say, “Yes, that’s what I want! How do they do it?”
To accomplish the goal, I had to determine for myself exactly what a power couple was and how to become one.
If this is something you want for your current or future relationship, I’ll show you what I found out…
First, What Is a Power Couple, Really?
To articulate this vision I had for me and Grant, I knew I had to get the criteria right.
So, I looked into the true meaning behind the power couple concept. And there were several definitions in the Urban Dictionary.
The first one said: “A couple where each of the people are powerful and influential in their own right.”
This initial explanation was fine, but it didn’t feel like it was complete. So, I kept reading…
Further into the paragraph was a definition I thought was so beautiful, I noted it down for myself. “They encourage goodness in the world and make it a better place by being together.”
Now that was what type of relationship I wanted to exemplify with my marriage.
Once the details were cleared up, it suddenly made sense to me. Not ALL celebrity or financially affluent relationships are power couples.
I realized it was going to be tough to make this goal happen. Luckily, there was nothing anywhere in the dictionary about being perfect…
The TRUTH About the “Perfect Couple”
Before my deep-dive into what a power couple truly was, there were certain relationships I looked up to.
But there was one pair of married friends Grant and I had which I admired above all. To me, they appeared to be perfect.
Perfect romance. Perfect home life. Perfect careers.
The partnership seemed too good to be true…
And it turned out, it was. The two ended their relationship in a bitter divorce.
I was in shock!
Nonetheless, the situation taught me a valuable lesson about how things seem versus how they are. Appearances are not what makes a good relationship or a fulfilling life.
You can’t be a power couple sitting on a couch and looking picture-perfect. Both of you need to be taking action and working together on the same team.
After that realization, I stopped comparing my relationship to others. And I started focusing on making mine the best it could be.
These are the steps I took to create a 10X marriage with Grant…
My Top 10 Tips to Strengthen Your Relationship as a Power Couple
As you’ll soon see, I have outlined ten tips to strengthen your relationship as a power couple. (I swear the fact there are ten like 10X is a coincidence!!)
If you take a sincere approach to each of these strategies, the minimal result you can expect is a healthier relationship.
Best case scenario, both you and your partner go further than you ever dreamed was possible.
Either way, you win.
Here’s the roadmap to building an empire as a power couple…
1. Acknowledge Each Role
Firstly, you have to delineate and acknowledge one another’s roles within your empire.
You and your partner have different levels of ability in different areas. Therefore, it is important to detail how those advantages are being utilized to make your partnership successful.
Answer the following questions together:
- What are each of your strengths and weaknesses?
- What can you do with these individual abilities to better the relationship?
- How can you show appreciation for what the other person contributes with these strengths and/or make it easier for one another to execute on them?
For example, Grant is more business-savvy than I am. That is not anything against me. He is just more experienced. At the same time, I am more capable of handling anything regarding our household and children.
As a result, I never nag him about working too much or being away from our family on business trips. In return, he defers to me when it comes to decisions about our home and daughters.
This acknowledgment of our roles allows us to move with trust and confidence in our marriage and work towards our shared goals…
2. Define Your Purpose as a Couple
This next tip may seem obvious, but you would be surprised at how many people haven’t figured out the purpose of their partnership!
Society seems to believe that your shared purpose is something you look at once you are “serious” or “taking things to the next level.”
However, doesn’t it make more sense to align your goals early on?
When you both are clear on your purpose, you see how your relationship has a bigger scope and ambition…
And that is what power looks like.
3. Get on the Same Page
Once you have defined your purpose as a couple, implementing this will be a lot easier. I’m talking about getting on the same page as your partner.
Again, I am going to share a story about me and Grant to illustrate my point.
When we first got married, Grant wanted children right away. But I wanted it to be just us for a little bit before we had kids.
While we weren’t on the same page as to when, we knew we both wanted to have children. Because we were on the same page long-term, we were able to come to a compromise and wait a couple of years.
Being on the same page is different from your purpose. Your purpose is what you want to achieve, whereas being on the same page is an agreement you have on important topics.
Both create a strong foundation for your relationship to reach power couple levels. Remind yourselves of them often as you continue through the next steps.
4. Focus on the Future — Not the Past
If you want your relationship to win, you need to stay out of the past and concentrate on the future.
Now, I’m not saying you should be a doormat and let your significant other walk all over you…
But I do insist that bringing up every single time they left wet towels on the bathroom floor isn’t going to further your ambitions as a power couple.
Communicate about issues as they occur, find a solution, and move forward. Bringing up the past only ensures neither of you get to the next level.
5. Stop Playing Games
Power couples have no time for little games — especially ones like the blame game. If you want a strong partnership, you have to stop playing around.
By and large, anything that could cause “lovers’ spats” or “drama” in your relationship needs to cease immediately.
From my experience, couples fall into this trap for two reasons:
- Their purpose and goals are not big enough.
- There is a lack of trust between the two parties.
The first of these reasons is easy enough to handle. Both of you sit down and find a larger-than-life, healthier game to play.
As for the second reason, you have to create an unbreakable foundation of trust between the two of you. This is how…
6. Build REAL Trust
Certainly, we can all agree that confidence in one’s partner is non-negotiable for a functioning relationship — let alone a power couple.
When I took an honest look back at my relationship, I saw there were opportunities for us to fast-track ourselves to the unshakable trust we share now.
I was able to narrow it down into three actionable items you can do yourself to build real trust…
For one, say you’ll have your significant other’s back, and make it known to everyone.
Don’t allow outsiders to disparage your partner or disrespect your relationship. Your spouse is going to trust you more quickly if they know you’re going to defend them.
Next, make, maintain, and deliver on your agreements. This one speaks for itself. You do what you say you are going to do, and others will trust you.
The last way to build real trust is to keep your partner’s PR in good standing. What I mean by this is don’t complain about your better half to your friends, family, etc.
You are supposed to be a solid power couple. This “natter” diminishes that.
Instead, try this…
7. Be Your Partner’s #1 Fan
Clearly, there is no better person to be your partner’s #1 fan…
But are you really fulfilling that role?
In a relationship, there are a multitude of ways to cheer one another on.
Simply knowing about all their ambitions, goals, and endeavors goes a long way. Ask about the other’s progress and encourage them when the road gets tough.
In other words, maintain an active interest in your partner.
I am sure you want your significant other to care about what you are doing. It only makes sense you do the same to elevate your relationship.
Still, power couples take it a step further.
8. Challenge Each Other
In contrast, it is also important to push your partner to be better as well as support them. At some point, you need to get out of your comfort zone to be successful in any area of your life.
Something I personally attribute to my marriage’s success is being the one who challenged Grant to become a billionaire.
That’s right, me.
Grant was already very affluent when we met and he continued to be as our relationship progressed.
Nonetheless, once we had been married a little while, I asked him when he was going to become a billionaire.
He pushed back at first. In fact, he was furious…
“When will you be satisfied?”
“When is enough enough?”
But I stayed calm and explained to him that I didn’t want him to do it because I needed money. I needed him to become a billionaire because that is who he was.
By the way, now Grant thanks me for it.
Power couples have to do more, not less.
9. Treat Your Marriage Like a Business
It doesn’t sound romantic, but treating your marriage like a business is a cornerstone of becoming a power couple.
This piece of advice is necessary because not doing so can result in one or both of you taking your relationship for granted.
Think about it. In business, you would never think of a client or colleague as dispensable. You wouldn’t treat them with disregard either. Acting this way causes relationships to deteriorate.
The same is true about marriages.
Just so you know, checking in on your relationship doesn’t have to take a lot of time. Meaningful moments and taking action on what needs to be addressed get the job done.
That being said, there is one more tip I have to become a power couple and build an empire together…
10. Defend Your Empire
Last but not least, you have to defend your empire from destructive forces. This is not just referencing gossip or people who may be trying to lure your significant other into infidelity — though it is certainly part of it.
The most critical — and hardest — part of defending your empire is keeping those in your inner circle clear of hidden enemies.
Covert enemies are the most dangerous because they are not easily detected. For this reason, look for some of these signs:
- Friends who speak ill of your partner or encourage you to keep things from them
- People who affect your mood to where it negatively impacts your relationship
- Business associates who flip-flop about the terms of joint venture agreements
Regardless of these individuals’ intentions, they are deadly to your kingdom. They have to go.
Start Applying the Power Couple Concept with This Exercise
Admittedly, these ten tips are just the basics of becoming a power couple. That is why I created the BAE Relationships Mastermind to really dig into the subject.
Whether you attend or not, I won’t leave you hanging. You can get started on your journey to becoming a power couple with the exercise below.
With your significant other, get out a piece of paper and create three columns. On one side, have your partner list their individual purpose and goals. On the other side, write yours.
Then, in the middle column, determine your goals and purpose as a couple. Additionally, note how your individual pursuits can feed into your shared objective.
You may find that some of your personal goals may not align with or serve your power couple ambition. I would encourage you to consider dropping those.
On the other hand, you can also get more clarity on how you two can better work together, which is the real purpose of this exercise.
All in all, becoming a power couple takes shared purpose, collaboration, and support for one another.
the king and queen have to be the examples and foundation of a thriving empire.
May these tips help you build yours,
Elena Cardone
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